I'm in Hue! The ancient capitol of Vietnam, Hue is HUMID. The air is saturated, I'm sweating all the time. I've never lived in a climate like this. Of course, the pollution is so much less than in Saigon, I'm not close to complaining about a little wet heat, but WOW. The middle of the jungle baby.
Jungle and tombs under rain, Tu Hieu Temple
Hue is the closest city to the DMZ (De-militarized Zone), which remains the most heavily bombed piece of earth on this planet. I've been told that more bombs were dropped over Hue than in all of WWII, but that that with a grain of salt. I have not verified its validity myself.
Currently, I'm in the middle of reading 3 books -- Thich Nhat Hanh's Old Path White Cloud, an epic and simple re-telling of the Buddha's lifetime (they're making it into a movie!); Sr. Chan Khong's Learning True Love: How I learned and Practiced Social Change in Vietnam, a beautiful and tragic account of the events of the war anf of Thay's life during that period; and Tim O'Brien's The Things They Carried, for the second time. With regard to the last two, and a visit to the War Remnant's Museum (or, A Showcase of the Atrocities Laid Upon the Vietnamese People by US Imerialists), I am slowly formulating a sense for the real devestation of this war, and all wars. It's horrific, this kind of violence, and the inhumanity it instills. I can't believe the destruction. I never understood. Agent Orange is still wrecking havoc on this nation, babies are being born still today with terrible deformities due to exposure. Many of its older victims are begging here on the streets of Hue and in the temples where we go to practice. I won't describe them, but I'm completely humbled before it. The suffering here is enormous and all-encompassing and continual.
The response that keeps re-surfacing is Thank god for Thich Nhat Hanh. A leader, a visionary. He has it, you know? He's fighting the beauocracy, he's fighting with peace and love and compassion and understanding. Without resentment or cynacism or demand. He is fighting, and he will win. It may take many more generations, but his message is true. LOVE ALL BEINGS. PREVENT ALL POSSIBLE SUFFERING. ACT WITH COMPASSION. DO NOT KILL. DO NOT DISCRIMINATE. It's simple, it's true, it's the most basic sort of honest. I am grateful for him, the man, but I am most grateful for the message he is unafraid to spread. The communist officials here are breathing down his neck, they repressed him and killed his supporters for 30 years, but he's here and he won't stop fighting, with love and grace and dedication. It's amazing.
Tombs of old Masters at Tu Hieu temple
Hue is home to Tu Hieu, which is Thay's root temple. It's in the middle of the jungle, wet and crumbling and beautiful. He was here 64 years ago as a novice monk, he was 16 and he embarked on his path from this very place. I love it, I really do. He leads walking meditation and tea cermonies with unfettered joy here, you can see how much he loves being home. Still, the conservative sides of Buddhist tradition in Vietnam, the ones that abandoned Thich Nhat Hanh and his message when it became too radical and too dangerous to their hierarchy, they are very strong in this region. Everyone is feeling a little on edge about it, even thought this is Thay's true home. A nun friend told me that every one of the monastics is focusing their energy on slowly transforming their elders trough example and practice. Such a complex system for such a simple message.
Thay and his children, pure joy
I am in great spirits right now. I was having a lot of trouble feeling settled in Saigon -- the pollution, the stares, the anger -- but Hue is much clearer. My roommate and I were also at odds, but I actually found the power in myself in confront her about it and we talked and she really listened to my difficulties, and we were able to come to a real understanding. I'm sorry if I'm gushing about something very small, but this is a really incredible moment for me. I've never had such clear and open communication over anger and misunderstanding. I'm actually growing. And I feel lighter, I feel more capable. I feel love.
Monk feeding dogs
Also, there's a french boy, Unai, here with his parents, and he made friends with a Vietnamese orphan at Tu Hieu. They've been spending all their time together even though they don't even come close to speaking the same language, and it's really wonderful to see. Taking turns on the french boy's gameboy. Whacking a basketball back and forth with huge sticks of bamboo. Playing with stray dogs. Like a corny movie, I can't help but Awwwwww all over the place.
Unai and his friend
And otherwise, I'm still enjoying fruit, long walks through the city, cheap-everything, and the prospect of travel to come. I'll be done with this part of my trip (following Thich Nhat Hanh, that is) by the end of the week, and heading to Thailand, Singapore, and Cambodia not long after. Friends and friends of friends to visit, volunteer work, back-packing, sight-seeing! Ah, my happiness is abound. I'm free.
Mosaic dragon
I love you all, hope you and yours are absolutely terrifically happy.
Until Next Time, "Those eight days (the Tet offensive) were a turning experience for me. Seeing so much death and despair, I learned that we must resist war at any price. Once a war gets started, it has a momentum and intensity that are very hard to stop." - Sr. Chan Khong, Learning True Love (READ THIS BOOK!)
So I'm back in Saigon! We returned on the 14th, had the 15th for rest (and some crazy Asian ass-kicking massage!), and jumped straight into the Great Requiem Ceremonies on the 16th. A few of my friends from Segment 1 left on the 15th, I've been very sad to see them go. It's been like starting all over again. But it's also quite the practice. Helping me to focus on my meditation and personal awareness.
Chanting and crowd
Anyway, the ceremonies! BIG, long, hot, intense. Some crazy Vietnamese chanting and prayer. Thay's dharma talks were really powerful, though. Really deeply delving into impermanence and transformation. The dead never leave us, they only change form, they are not manifested physically but they are still with us. It was a beautiful 3-day theme. I still have so much trouble swallowing my cynicism when it comes to those other-worldly theories, but I'm starting to see that they're really much less other-worldly than I originally thought.
Bridge to the Dead at nightfall
The ceremonies were meant to call the dead, the hungry ghosts who have not found peace since the war, to this place and allow them to find peace. We directed them with the lotus-light candles, and encouraged their re-birth in peaceful states through chanting and food offerings.
Candle-lotus vigil We released these candles into the very fragrant Saigon River 7,000 candle-lit lotuses, floating I was really worried the whole river would ignite. (The pollution is palpable)
The most powerful thing was the sheer volume of Vietnamese people in attendance. Thousands of people, chanting and praying and grieving. I still have grasped the enormity of it.
Food offerings to the Buddha and a monastic procession
I don't have too much to say, I guess. Catch-up day, rested all morning, heading into town for shopping and dinner in a few minutes.
Saigon feels like...
This city is crazy.
Fo reals.
Until Next Time, "We know that hell exists everywhere in the world. We vow to practice in order to not create more hells."
Right now I'm on a website called Jetstar. I'm finding too many SEAsian flights under US$50. It's too hard. How on earth is a person supposed to continue functionning when they can go EVERYWHERE for so CHEAPLY? How can a person concentrate? How can a person breathe? (Then again, "The airline does not guarantee that it will be able to carry you and your Baggage in accordance with the date and time of the flights specified. Schedules may change and flights may be delayed or cancelled for a range of reasons including but not limited to bad weather, air traffic control delays, strikes, technical disruptions, network changes and late inbound aircraft (refer to section 8.1 of the Conditions of Carriage for more information)." HAH! Accident waiting to happen. I'm in.)
The following is a bit that I wrote yesterday (March 11) but didn't get to post at that time.
Today was the Alms Round in Bao Loc. Anyone need back story? In the time of the Buddha, all monks and nuns had one meal per day, and it was food gathered by begging local villagers for donations. A few Buddhist traditions still operate this way. However, it is customary to have a celebratory Alms Round every so often, where the monks and nuns carry their bowls around town collecting food in great abundance, later giving most of it to poor and needy families in the area.
Line of nuns
The Alms round today, led by Thay in a black highlander (The Buddha-mobile), was just crazy! 2,000 monks and nuns, walking the streets in a line being mobbed by old women, children, and families with toothpaste, medicine, sweet treats, yoghurt, fruit, the traditional 'rice wrapped in a banana leaf with seasame salt.' It was so powerful and jubilant!
The throng of people, the monks inside
The Western lay delegation stood on the sidelines with the Vietnamese locals, we helped to collect the unbelievable excess of food from the monks and nuns who passed and stuff it in army sacks for later donations.
The crowd
We also played with small children and had our pictures taken by the locals. They love taking our picture. My friends Brant and Ray are both 6'4'' -- they're GIANTS here in Asia. People are always running up to them and measuring themselves. They wave their palms over their heads and match them up with the middle of Brant's forearm. It's pretty hilarious, how novel they become.
Big Brant, little baby.
Baby monks on parade, little tiny children giving donations in order to "collect merit." Fantastic.
Hello, baby monk.
At the end of the day, we met at Ao Quang temple to eat together, the monastics, the Western lay delegation, and a delegation of monks and nuns from Korea!! They're passing through to say "Hey" to Thay! He spoke to them in Korean! I'm sorry, the little Korean in me just died.
Thay!
-- End yesterday, re-commence real time --
We've had lots of free time at home/the hotel because of monastic-only events at the monastery. HOT, sleepy, lots of ice cream and fruit, chocolate, a wonderful book, card games, fortune telling, goofy stories. It's been really lovely, lots of time with people (relatively) close to my own age and happy to be here. However, most of them are leaving on Wednesday or Thursday. And then I start all over, making friends. It's really a downer.
But I have made friends! And we will find each other on the path, someday.
Anyway, it's dinner time, I gotta get a move on. Making travel plans! Info to come.
The 5-day lay retreat was a wonderful gift. I hardly expected such intense practice! And so many people! Upwards of 7,000 Vietnamese retreatants from all around this area. You'd think it would be chaos, right? 7,000 people on a few green acres? How on earth could a couple hundred monks and nuns keep 7,000 people meditative and quiet for five days in 90 degree heat? Good questions, all. But it was incredible. These people are truly devoted. 3,000 people could cram into the meditation hall for Thay's dharma talks, and the rest would sprawl on the steps and the lawn outside. He was so inspiring, so down to earth. He brought the practice of mindfulness and compassion to a real world audience, to people who are very far from him and who need peace more than most. He was very direct. Of course, it was wonderful just to be there with them, experiencing his presence for the first time. We did a lot of communication work, loving speech and deep listening. It's amazing how simple happiness can be. It brought me much deeper in my own awareness, closer to something solid and ready. I don't know if that can be explained, but it's really extraordinary.
Eating Mangos!
Of course, there were other very good and very bad things about the retreat. To start, 7,000 people in close quarters pass colds like wildfire. I was moderately ill with local bacteria/intestinal issues, which are common and unpleasant for westerners arriving in SEAsia, and I battled a cold for a few days. Coughing, sneezing, runny nose, general exhaustion. The days are long! Up at 5:30, maybe a nap after lunch, not home to bed until 8:30 or 9pm. But I've rested since then, today in particular, so no harm done. I got to sleep until 7:30 today! What a gift! ;-)
Me in my hammock
Good things? My hammock! The Western lay delegation received army surplus hammocks as a gift from the monastics, they're incredible! I love it! Cool, comfortable, portable. Took a little while to learn how to set them up, but I'm a pro now, baby! And the scenery couldn't be better. On a particularly tired day, I bought a mango and a loaf of bread, and had lunch in my hammock next to the waterfall before falling asleep for a few hours. I swear, it's paradise.
Joy!
Also, for dharma discussion groups, I was lucky enough to be included in a bi-lingual, multi-cultural, youth exchange extravaganza! A large group of monks, nuns, Vietnamese, and westerners under 30 (or so), discussing our experiences and challenges. It was really interesting. The Vietnamese young people were really slow to share at first, really hesitant. They said that "sharing" is not a part of their culture, it's not something they're used to. But after just a few minutes on the first day they were really in it. Allowing us to share their suffering and be a part of their journey. Plus, we played fun energy games and goofy challenges. Stuff I haven't done since summer camp or before, but everyone could shout and laugh, Vietnamese or english. Whoo!
Wheelbarrow monks!
But yesterday!! I can't even begin to describe the joy from yesterday's adventure! Hah! Okay, the plan for the day was: visit schools. Plum Village has funded the construction, staffing, and supplying of 1,000+ schools in the whole of Vietnam. That's a million dollar charity organization. Yesterday, we visited nine of them. These are real schools, with real kids and real teachers. Just single room, no-frills buildings. Some have desks, some have chalkboards. No books, no toys. But they're clean, and they're built! The kids get one fully rounded, nutritious meal per day. They're cared for. Our first stop was a tribal village where most of the inhabitants weren't even speaking Vietnamese. Something else entirely. But we got to interact a little, I ended up playing tag with 40+ six- and seven-year-olds. you should've seen the smiles! It made me so happy, just interacting so closely with them. Not something I got to do for the rest of the day really. It felt like I was playing with my brothers. Completely natural.
The kids! (I’m on the left)
We continued to visit small, relatively local schools by bus until lunch when we had to switch to smaller vans. The group shrank a little, but we were off into the bush! Really bumpy dirt road, red and dusty. It was HOT, mid-afternoon, and the drive was long. We saw a few really beautiful pre-schools along the way, such children!
Pre-school, 18 months to 3 years
But the real adventure began in the jungle. No more plumbing, no more pavement, no more cars of any kind! Of course, as we’re driving, a nun turns to me and says, “You know, this road gets completely unsurpassable when it rains. Turns into nothing but mud. The tires can’t move at all. Hey, look it’s raining in the distance!” And you should’ve seen the clouds overhead. So, naturally, it rained. Cats and dogs. Torrential, tropical, southeast-asian rain, for about 35 minutes. We were completely frozen in a muddy river the whole time, tucked in our little monastic van. People passed around boiled peanuts and rice cakes and purified water. It was a beautiful storm, and it felt like a fever breaking, the heat and humidity just dropped. As soon as the rain slowed, Sister Chan Khong (the one and only! I mentioned her before. This woman has LIVED!) said “Alright, let’s go, the kids are waiting for us!” Our poor driver got us as far as he could, which was about a kilometer farther than the original location. We left the other two vans behind (poor guys, they waited for us there for two hours! I happened to be on the bus with Sister Chan Khong, luck of the draw…). Sister said, “Can’t drive any further, we walk!” And jumped out the fan. Crazy lady. There were about 12 of us in the van with her, all told. The sky had cleared by this point, and all the dusty vegetation had been rinsed clean and was almost glowing with color. Muddy red earth, big gray sky. It was so beautiful.
Landscape
So we were off! The walk was long and sticky. I almost lot a shoe at one point, so ended up going barefoot in the red mud. It was cool and fresh. Rain smells like rain everywhere! Local kids in blue and red uniforms were whizzing by us on motorbikes. After a little while, a man on a motorbike came by and asked us if we needed a hand. Sister Chan Khong was all about it! This 80 year old Vietnamese rock star just tucked up her robes and was off. It was FANTASTIC.
Sister Chan Khong on a motor bike!
The rest of us walked up and down muddy hills, through the Vietnamese brush. It felt like The Things They Carried, In Pharoah’s Army, I’m not kidding. Coffee plants taller than men. Little kids were walking with us by this point, the middle-school aged ones in uniform, and they’d peel off on little tiny paths every so often, presumably to their homes, hidden among the plantlife and mist.
Rural Vietnam and bikers
The school was much like the others. It was beautiful though, the people were so grateful to have us there, that we’d come all the wayfrom town. Most of them had never in their lives gone that far. It was the most wonderful group of people. We couldn’t bring the gifts for the children all the way out, they were still in one of the other vans. But a few people had crackers, someone had a brick of cheese, and they were all dumped into one of the cone hats and passed around to the children, who ate with joy. It was really beautiful. One of the poorest areas that Plum Village supports, but these people were happy, functioning people. They don’t need plumbing or cars to live. Not at all. Not even close.
Baby monks on bikes
That’s what I’ve learned. The third world is not suffering because it lacks for anything. These populations, tribal cillages, rural communities, are suffering when modern civilizations build gross production factories and pay their staff nothing. When they invade for land and agricultural resources. When they force these peoples to evolve and change, but don’t give them the time or the materials to do so. That’s what causes unhappiness, strife, extinction. It’s terrible, what our world can do. We’re all just people, living differently. I’m learning, anyway.
Fat Happy Buddha
And today I’ve been thinking back, relaxing, writing postcards. I’ve got enough energy to sustain me, I need a lot less sleep than I did at home. I haven’t figured out why yet, but I think it’s because I’m not dragging myself down with negativity so much anymore. I’m opening up, I’m finding apologies and forgivenesses, I’m breathing deeply.
I do, I love it here.
Until Next Time, "Anger is a mental formation. It is an energy. Mindfulness is also an energy. Think of your anger as a baby that is crying. First, you must hold that baby to calm it down, just take care of its pain. Then, you can look deeply into its source. Your anger is a child. Your mindfulness is its mother
