Don't Read This; GO VOTE!

You there! Hello again!

Did you have a happy Halloween?

Did you see Midsummer Night’s Dream?

Did you vote?

WAS IT FOR KERRY?

Oh la la, I’m sure everyone is happy to see the end of the election madness. I like being here, because the articles are basic and straightforward. I’ve read like twenty different opinions in the French newspapers. They all mock Bush. And I love them.

I read a quote from his speech in Columbus on Friday with good ol’ Arnie Schwarzenegger, and it said Bushie made a funny: “The governor Schwarzenegger and I have two things in common: We’re both bad at speaking English. And we with have massive biceps!” All I can say is, this man is not allowed to be our President. Again.

Alright, shall I pick up where I left off? This could take a while.

So, after Villandry, we went to the hotel and got our room assignments. I ended up in a double with a girl Mari, who is in group rouge avec moi. It was fine, we’re not very close, so we barely spent any time together, but it was easy to talk to her, and neither of us make much noise or have terrible body odor (that I’m personally aware of), so it worked out fine.

The night passed with lots of wandering around the halls and finding friends in random rooms and basically just popping in and out of everywhere for a few hours before scuttling back to our rooms just before check in and passing out on top of the covers with one shoe on.

No, that didn’t happen. But it almost did. I was tired.

The next day, our first chateau was Chenonceau. And alright, I don’t know if you know anything about castles or their construction, but this castle is just a freaking Frankenstein of castles. There’s a section from the middle ages, a section from the first Renaissance, and a section from the second. And none of the architects even tried to blend their style to the pre-existing sections. It’s just a line of buildings, which happen to be connected. Silly castle. Still, it was beautiful. It had great gardens and full-on wooded areas, which basically only make the fairy tale more plausible. And on the top floor, there was this huge exhibition of modern art by a one-named man, Tremoins. And it was astounding. He had these larger-than-life sculptures of people faisant l’amour, three separate ones, and it was ridiculously realistic. Especially their feet. He did feet really well.

I wish I could show some to you. Hopefully one of my friends took pictures. I don’t think he has a website. I have a brochure, but that won’t be any good until June. So be interested then.

Then between Chenonceau and Chambord, the next chateau, we stopped in a little tiny town called Amboise, and were given 7 Euros to eat on our own. So Evie, Leah, Bianca and I were wandering around looking for a creperie that wasn’t massively crowded, and we stumbled upon this little tiny Chinese restaurant. It was amazing. Unbelievable. I hadn’t seen Chinese food since August. I’m not kidding, we sprinted our way to the door, practically drooling, end ended up blowing all our money and then some on this funnily expensive, not-that-great but-still-amazing French Chinese food. I got lemon chicken. Dear me, I miss it even now.

So then we hopped back on the bus, and traveled to Chambord. Does anyone know the story of Chambord? It’s this great big castle that was built at the beginning of the second Renaissance. And it made all of these great architectural leaps. And it’s enormous. It’s ridiculous. It’s extravagant and calculated and completely unbelievable. My friend Hadas and I wandered around together for the full two hours, being quieter than normal. We were supposed to travel with an adult, but all the groups got separated, so the guards were picking us of in large, loud groups and kicking us out of the castle. Hadas and I managed to avoid any confrontation. We were two of maybe ten who actually spent the whole visit inside the castle.

It was really beautiful, though. Honestly, the grounds and the art and the view. They had all these imitation pieces on display, copies of the Mona Lisa and Madonna on the Rocks and all those famous pieces that you can only see after waiting in line for seven hours at the Louvre (which I didn’t do, by the way). So that was cool. I don’t know how to describe this castle. This was the one where you could stand on a balcony and lean over the railing, and think about what must’ve been going on three hundred years ago in that exact spot. The glory and the power and the riches and the fame that must’ve crossed that courtyard to this field. It just doesn’t exist anywhere else.

So that was Chambord. Then we went back to the hotel and ate dinner and found Life as a House on tv in French. Let’s put it out there right now that Hayden Christiansen is just as terrible in French as he is in English, but that doesn’t change the fact that he is ungodly attractive. But it was awesome to see the movie in French, and without any commercials or anything. God, it’s such a good movie. GO WATCH IT RIGHT NOW.

Finally, our final Loire chateau: Breze (pronounced bray-zay). I’ve never hated anything so much in my entire life. Ever. Ever. EVER. It was a guided visit through this small, ugly old house that lasted three hours and was completely in French, and no one was paying attention, and THREE HOURS. It was excruciating. I don’t remember anything about it. There was nothing special about this chateau. It only opened to the public a year or two ago, and they’re gonna have to shut it down again because no one has been going, so it costs too much money. It was absolutely pointless. Everyone basically died. My friend Evie, who’s a filmmaker, had her video camera, and she made a movie of us all being tortured by the sickness of this man’s monotone. That part was actually a lot of fun.

So then we came home. I got a big huge game of Psychiatrist going on the bus. That was cool. And I listened to Transatlanticism on repeat, also cool. And I read The Dream of Scipio for the millionth time. Have I told you yet that you have to read this book? Read this book. Please. I’m begging you. Please. It’s so good. It’s so GOOD. Read it, please, read it. You have to. It's cool.

So that was the Loire Valley. Whooo, I’m tired.

Paris will be just as long and involved, I’m afraid, so I’ll leave it at that for now, and get you another update within a few days time.

I hope that’s alright.

Just so you know, it was amazing and impossible and incredible all at once.

So, there we are.

Long live John Kerry.

I miss you.

Until Next Time, “Watching a coast as it slips by a ship is like thinking about an enigma. There it is before you – smiling, frowning, inviting, grand, mean, insipid, or savage, and always mute with and air of whispering. Come and find out.”
-- Joseph Conrad, Heart of Darkness

COUNTDOWN to return: 212 days